If you are the friend or family member of someone who is gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender…
- Get support for yourself. It is important to realize you are not alone. Find the phone number of the nearest Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG) chapter.
- Take your time. Acceptance may not come instantly, but be honest about your feelings.
- Don’t be nervous about using the “correct” language. Honesty and openness creates warmth, sincerity and a deeper bond in a relationship. If you are not sure what is appropriate, ask for help.
- Realize that the situation may be as difficult and awkward for your LGBT loved one as it is for you.
Before the visit…
- Practice in advance if you are going to be discussing your family member’s sexual orientation or gender identity with family and friends. If you are comfortable talking about it, your family and friends will probably be more comfortable too.
- Anticipate potential problems, but do not assume the reactions will always be what you expected.
- Consult with your LGBT loved one when coordinating sleeping arrangements if he or she is bringing home a partner.
- If your family member is transgender, practice using the correct pronouns.
During the visit…
- Treat an LGBT person like you would treat anyone else in your family.
- Take interest in your family member’s life. He or she is still the same person.
- Don’t ask your LGBT family member to act a certain way. Let them be their natural selves.
- If your LGBT family member is bringing a partner, acknowledge him or her as you would any other family member’s partner.
- If your LGBT family member is bringing a partner, include him or her in your family traditions. Ask your LGBT family member about his or her partner if you know they have one.
Find tips for a happy holiday for LGBT individuals now!
- See more at: http://community.pflag.org/AllyHolidays#sthash.ilkMqypS.dpuf
We need you to make a call now.
There will be a series of crucial votes on the Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA) in the US Senate this week. It is the first time this bill has made it to a vote since 2007 when it passed in the House…and this will be the first time a fully-inclusive ENDA will ever reach a Floor vote.
Please call both of your Senators and say, “As your constituent, I am asking you to vote YES on ENDA when it comes to the Senate floor for a vote this week.”
We need at least 60 votes in the Senate today–it’s close–and we need to send a message to the House of Representatives that they need to act too.
Changing hearts and minds is what PFLAGers do. You know that and we have proof that it works when it comes to ENDA. Here’s what happened after our Lobby Day with an undecided congressman from New York who became a bill sponsor after a meeting with PFLAGers:
According to the Congressman’s office, “…Congressman Gibson met with a group of constituents in Washington last week who asked him to consider cosponsorship of ENDA,” said Gibson spokeswoman Stephanie Valle. “The Congressman and our legislative staff reviewed the legislation, and agreed it matched the Congressman’s support for our Bill of Rights and equal protection under the law as well as largely squares with existing New York State law. Given the thousands of bills introduced each Congress, this demonstrates why we welcome meeting with constituents in Washington and New York State. Hearing directly from New Yorkers about their support for legislation gives our office the opportunity to review a particular bill that is important to a constituent and consider it for support.”
Click here, then click on “Elected Officials” and enter your Zip Code to get the contact information for YOUR legislators.
Call, urge their support, share your story!
Let your voice change the world.
Kristen Kinard and Jean Hodges will be attending the National PFLAG convention next week. We would love to “flood” our local representatives, like Cory Gardner, with letters during this same week to support the work PFLAG is doing.
Please craft a letter, using this document as a sample, and send it to Kristen at email@example.com within the next week. She will print and collate all the letters and take them to DC for distribution.
Thanks for your support!
Where I spend my money is a reflection of my values, and I share the following values with PFLAG:
1) A family’s unconditional love can heal painful wounds inflicted by a harsh society.
2) A conversation with another parent on my same journey brings more peace, solace and comfort than 20 conversations with a therapist.
3) Helping my child find other people like her to support her on her journey is a sacred charge.
PFLAG has helped me and my family grow in our love and understanding of each other. It has kept us together through a harrowing journey, and for that I am eternally grateful.
But what else do I get for those dues each year? I get to leverage the PFLAG brand. When I need a school to listen or a county agency to hear my concerns about our lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans* children, or an elected representative to return my call, when I say I’m a member of PFLAG, they are more likely to listen.
Finally, I get the talent and dedication of National staff, who are a phone call away when I’m faced with something that I don’t understand or that frightens or threatens one of our families; who help me learn to be a better leader in my own chapter; and who offer free training and best practices for me to leverage. In my calculation, that’s worth a whole lot more than what I pay in dues!
From Catherine Hyde, Mid-Atlantic Regional Director
Transgender-Coordinator, PFLAG Columbia-Howard County, MD
Time to Renew Your PFLAG membership!
$25/individual; $35/family unit; $15 if that’s all you can afford. You can use a credit card with Pay-Pal on this site, or you can mail a check made out to PFLAG Boulder County to Rosemary Campbell, Treasurer, P.O.Box 19696, Boulder, CO 80308.
Sunday, October 13th, 3pm
Longmont Public Library, 409 4th Ave (& Emery), Rooms A & B
Please join us for a screening of “Rainbow Warriors,” a documentary film
created by youth involved in Branching Seedz of Resistance, a group sponsored by the CAVP that works to break cycles of violence affecting LGBTQ youth.
One of the film’s creators, Mimi Madrid, and one other youth from Branching Seedz will be presenting.
Rainbow Warriors is a film project created by and for young Queer and Two Spirit people of color to portray the resiliency their community experiences in response to the emotional and physical effects of suicide. These are our real life accounts. We share our stories, visions, and prayers. Rainbow Warriors has been our declaration of sacred life and resistance to our demise as a people haunted by generational, interpersonal and institutional violence. Sharing our stories of pain, struggle and survival is not only self-healing but done in the hope that they will help guide and remind us of the sacredness of life for following generations of young LGBTQ and Two Spirit youth who deal with depression, suicide, bullying and other.
Rainbow Warriors began as a film about suicide survivors, but is really about positive energy for youth advocacy among Native American and other marginalized queer youth of color.
We will meet at Longmont Public Library, Rooms A & B at 409 4th
Ave, Longmont. The program starts at 3pm. A support group will meet at 2.
New Date & Time: 3:00 pm, Sunday, September 8, 2013
First United Methodist Church
1421 Spruce St, Boulder
Karen and Alisha from Trans Youth Education and Support (“TYES”) will take us on a fast-paced ride through the quickly evolving world of trans* and gender non-conforming youth. We will hear about exciting new research, regulations, and rulings. They will share insights from the dynamic Gender Spectrum conference they recently attended and share with us what they believe will be the next new thing. We will also hear about some exciting changes with the TYES organization that will directly impact Boulder PFLAG. Come join us and try to keep up! If not, there will be hand outs and links for future reference.
Refreshments will be served
Support Group will meet at 2:00 pm in the church library.